3 days, 2 nights

im surprised by myself yet again missing someone who i havent seen for a veeeery long time. sucks. it really sucks. but somehow i couldnt forget those 3 days that we spent together. nothing romantic or whatever. just... together. ive never had something so ordinary but very special at the same time.

you made me love having breakfast coz that meant the start of another whole day of doing whatever with you. you made packed lunch yummier than gourmet food. having coffee was the simplest yet sweetest bonding we had. that was OUR thing.

and even the ride back home, you made every bit of it unforgettable with your non-stop, straight english crazy rant-slash-monologue of how a jerk your friend is for taking your phone. it became a monologue when we all got tired of responding to you since you really didnt have a plan to stop talking hahaha. you know how i really didnt like to be an accomplice right? i wasnt really up to being a part of the prank coz i saw how worried you were about your phone. you looked so pathetic. pathetically cute at that. hehe ;)

our stop in a fastfood chain was even better. i just loved how you ate off of my plate even if i wasnt even finished with it yet. but of course i let you, coz... just coz..

i was even surprised when i wasnt pikon when you made snide remarks about me eating so slowly.. your words, as i remember it, were,

"Wohoo kunyari ang bagal mo kumain, pero siguro pag walang nakatingin mabilis..."

it didnt piss me off.. coz of the fact that even we just spent a couple of days together, you already know how turtle-ish i am when eating. that's also why you sit beside me during meals. with that i also know how fast you are in stealing food. you're so kadiri how you wait for my tira-tira. kadiri but still super cute.

yes, most of what i remember about you is food and every time we ate together. i love food and you love food too.. therefore...... haha. how i wish.

ive never told anybody this story like this before coz somehow im stupid and ashamed of liking someone like you. i dont want to be called that 3-letter word that people like you are supposed to have. (ok if u dont understand what this sentence means... then, good. i didnt really mean anyone to understand this whole entry too haha) i also dont want people to think that im crazy for thinking of you in this kind of light. coz even i myself know that the chances of us being anything more than whatever we were then is so thin that its close to impossible.

the chances of that happening is more likely not to happen now especially because where you are and what you are doing now, that could be the only way of us meeting again, is the very same place/path that i have been trying to avoid. dammit.

now that i think about it and also with that facebook app telling me what god is saying to me.. maybe.. just maybe.. you are the person that god's using for me to go to that path. he knows that i'll do anything just to leer away from it. and that he also knows that you were the only, but nonetheless strongest weakness i have ever had. argh.

should i do it? should i step out, give it a try and test the waters i have always feared? but, would you save me? would you still be with me? be beside me?

wth. i dont know what to do. but i wont resist if that path would personally come to me and present itself to me. but for now.... IMY.